Nomad in love?

Prompted by a post from my fellow travel blogger, I have a few words on whether your love of travel is secretly sabotaging your potential for a relationship.

As you may have noticed, I try to keep my private life...well, private. I have other blogs for that kind of stuff. So, since this blog is dedicated to travelling and exploration of the world and the self, from that perspective, I try to streamline my posts to showcase more facts, interesting observations, but something that would be relevant to all the potential readers out there. Hence why my posts are quite sporadic- some days I just need to rant, and this is not the place for that.

That said, this issue of whether or not you will meet someone because you are not stable or rooted in one place doesn't just apply to the travel bugs out there- as an exploration geologist, my life takes me all over the world, sometimes for a few weeks, sometimes for a month, sometimes indefinitely,-but that is something I knew well in advance when choosing my career, I just didn't know how hard it would be.

Each time I am faced with the decision: is the new adventure worth losing what I have here, right now? And almost always, I hear a resounding “yes!” in my head-what is meant to be, will be. You cannot stop life from happening, but you can stop fear from letting you life your life the way you envision to, or secretly hope to.

As one of my friends once said: "people break up living in the same city every day, why would long-distance relationship automatically be destined for a break-up?" While I whole-heartedly agree that living in the same city does not offer immediate chances for the success of a relationship, having a long-distance relationship is not picnic either (although the comfort of knowing that you won't run into them at your favourite cafe after you break up is a great perk!)

Although there are some great uplifting examples of long-distance working out for committed couples, who have spent more than 2 years apart, only to reunite and get married and live happily ever after(...so far), it takes a fantastic dose of commitment, dedication, trust and,most importantly-great communication skills. Let's face is, when you cannot simply meet up after a disagreement, put your arms around each other, and agree to "forgive and forget", all you have to rely on is skillful communication-avoiding those sharp corners and possible problematic/sensitive topics.

Having said that, distance is not to blame for whether or not your relationship survives. Let's face it, throughout our lives, there will be circumstances when you will be forced to spend time away from your partner-days, weeks, maybe even months-so it is not through avoiding the separation, but rather how one chooses to deal with it that determines the "rate of survival" of this particular relationship. Breaks can be nice: having more time for yourself, your hobbies, meeting with the friends you may have been neglecting, getting to all those projects around the house you keep putting off, going the gym more often (and getting a free "fell-good" hormone boost!) and of course, having time to miss each other -all of this can put the romance back into a relationship, refresh your perspective on life and what is important- when done right.

I've had relationships fall apart equally as fast when a long-distance turned into living together, and vice versa. Despite all the challenges and unknowns, I am a firm believer that you should not let fear stop you-be it fear of missing out, fear of change, or fear of being alone for an indefinite amount of time- and I salute all of you brave souls out there who dare to explore what beyond what is familiar and comfortable. If someone truly wants to share their journey with you, it will happen- regardless of time, place, circumstances and plans.

Call of the wild

Whenever I wake up much earlier then I'd like,  tiredly dragging myself, half-awake and still sleepy-eyed to whatever it is I have to do that day: a class, or, worse yet, a "job" that doesnt pay me any money, that I find extremely boring and a total waste of time. I hate doing something for the sole reason of getting a small piece of a puzzle for someone else: imagine learning new software, spending days entering data, figuring out how it works, just so that in the end, you can get a number for someone to put into yet another software to "improve" their model. It all seems pretty unreal and, well, useless. 

So i'm asking myself in the mornings: is this really what my life had come to? Is this "growing up"? If so, I don't really want it -no, thanks! I truly miss the days of waking up on the edge of civilized settlements and hearing a helicopter starting up, getting ready for a new and exciting day of adventures. Every morning is fresh, as you head out from your tent to the breakfast one, there is a sense of newness and anticipation.

I have just finished reading some great, lengthy e-mails of a friend of mine doing geology work in Cambodia. And it made me remember the beauty and romanticism of being a geologist in the first place, the reason why so many before us got into geology: the sense of discovery, adventure and pioneering spirit. 

Unfortunately it has now mostly been replaced by big money, solid job and a steady supply of cash that lets you afford everything an avergage person can dream of: a big house, new car, 1-2 vacations to Mexico a year.

However, it takes more than the average person to throw themselves into the wild, the unknown, with a leap of faith and see what comes up for them. It often includes struggles with the seasons, nature, loneliness, tiredness, frustrations...all to be reimbursed by amazing life experience, growth and knowing one's self.